Tuesday, April 10, 2012

I Just Don't Get It Sometimes...

I am really struggling today.  It doesn't have anything to do with me (or maybe it does), but I just don't get most people...most of the time.

I don't have a perfect life, very far from it....I have my own trials and tribulations on a daily basis.  I have reasons to be extremely bitter, but I choose not to go that route.  Living in negativity does nothing for me, my life, or the lives of those I am in contact with on a daily basis.  Negative thoughts are rooted in hatred and I would dislike it very much if hate was ever rooted in my heart.

Hate makes me so sad and it confuses me that it doesn't make other people feel the same way.

Why?  What is mankind's obsession with it?  Does it make you feel better about yourself?  It doesn't for me.

Cookies I made for a Kindergarten Easter Party
I don't know...maybe I am just weird?  This might be a concept that I will never understand.  Maybe that's the way my higher power wants to keep my heart...free from letting the negativity and the mean spirited behavior of others from entering my capacity.  I am not claiming to be perfect, though.  There have been times in my life when I have been less than virtuous, but I do not harbor in it.  I seek a better path.  I praise everyday with goodness and light.

The Party Table All Set Up
I know I see the same example in my photography.  I like to take happy, uplifting shots...I show life as I want to see it, but I know it's not all sparkles and buttercream icing.  Things are not always as they seem in photos.  A photo is a view on the world.  I just happen to focus on things that make me happy...things that make me smile...things I want to remember.

You Are Never To Old to Get an Easter Basket
Maybe, I am the lucky one? I just don't know.  I wish people would just let their hearts learn how to accept life for what it is...to reach out and share an uplifting word with someone that may need it.  To honestly be there for others and help them to focus on goodness and learning to live their own lives...not worrying about what others are or are not doing.

I Love Easter Decorations almost as much as Christmas!  
I guess what it boils down to is...when I am wondering about the motives of others or why some people want to be a part of my life and then not fully accept me for who I am, that is when I need to respectfully pull back and protect my heart from being confused and hurt.  Silence is Golden and I refuse to hold my breath waiting for something that may never be.  Maybe it's just too far damaged for there to ever be true resolution...and I need to be okay with that.

Edwards Ham from Virginia Traditions, Ham Salad Sandwiches
Ham Salad in the Spring makes me happy.  I made an outdoor lunch yesterday before I agreed to start my Paleo eating regimen for the Spring and Summer.  If you have never had Ham Salad before then you must try this recipe...I mean home-made Ham Salad...not the mutilated, pre-packaged stuff you can find in the deli section of your grocery market.  That is NOT Ham Salad.

Virginia Ham Salad~~

2 cups, chopped Country Ham
1/4 cup chopped onion...I used both green onion and Sweet Vidalia Onion
1/4 cup chopped green pepper
2 tablespoons sweet pickle relish

Salad Sauce:

1 cup mayo...in the South, we prefer Dukes or Hellmann's.
1/4 milk
1/2 teaspoon black pepper
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon crushed garlic
2 shakes Frank's Hot Sauce...I put that shit on everything, Your Majesty.

Add all the sauce ingredients into a jar and shake...reserving extra sauce in the fridge for up to one week.

Add enough Salad Sauce to the ham mixture to make wet.  Stir well and then make your sandwiches or just eat it out of a bowl, which is what I usually do because it's that good....and it makes me happy.

This is Home Girl and I will not be holding my breath anymore.  I can only focus on me.  I will not be convicted to live in other people's agendas.  I work really well with honesty when tempered with love.  Don't hate.  The only person you should have expectations of is yourself.


tara said...

Will have to try the recipe
We can do it Marlene!

Andi said...

<3 you just the way you are! :)