Saturday, December 15, 2012

Such Sadness and Grief

I am completely heart broken over the Sandy Hook Elementary Shootings that took place in Newtown, Connecticut yesterday.  There are no words to express the devastation this young man caused in the lives of innocent people.

I'm asking the same question so many others are asking...why?

How did this come to be?  What can we do as a nation, a world, to insure the safety of our children and their parents, their educators??

There are no easy or simple answers, but the time is now that we need active dialogue to search for a solution.

I feel so grateful that all my babies were able to call their mother and tell me how much they loved me last night.  I said a few more "I Love You" back to them than we normally exchange, but it was was needed.  Even though they are all grown and understand that this place can be a cruel world to live in, they needed that extra little mommy snuggle to reassure them.

I am very thankful I could have those conversations with them.

This morning, as the world wakes up, there are many loved ones of the victims that do not have that luxury....and that hurts my heart.

I am the parent of a child with a severe personality disorder.  He has struggled for most of his life and is currently incarcerated due to his inability to manage his behavior in the outside world.

I feel a certain sense of peace when I know he's locked behind bars.  As a mother, this is an awful thing to admit, but for the safety of the community, myself, and my loved is certainly necessary.

I'm not ashamed to admit this about him.  I think more parents/caregivers need to come out of complacency and have conversations with law enforcement, with social workers, with medical personnel about family members that have the capacity to harm society.

Obviously, the thought that "we'll just manage this on our own"....will not work.  If you know of someone who has documented mental health issues, then community members need to be aware so that these individuals can be watched and monitored.

Invasion of privacy?  I don't believe so.  Do we not monitor sex offenders and put convicted felons on supervised probation and parole??

I honestly believe it's time that our world begins to "watch" children and adults that meet criteria for sociopathic, anti-societal, and aggressive disordered diagnoses.

If the parents had sought help earlier or had alerted the community that there were markers to the potential behavior of this young man and had the parents taken the appropriate steps to secure their personal weapons, we might not be dealing with acts of violence by such highly disturbed young men.

If we can open our eyes to the problems of this world, then we can see with greater clarity.

I love my son....I hurt for the struggles that he deals with, but I will not sit here blindly and ignore the potential danger that is there for his surroundings, the community.  I will be a pro-active voice for the conversations that we, as a human race, need to have concerning the emotionally disabled.

Take a second to read this article, A Guide to Mass Shootings in America written by Mother Jones  With a heavy heart, I looked at the map and read each one.

Had these parents been a voice for their children, had they forced their communities to monitor and intercede on the behave of their mentally ill child/adult child, we might possibly have saved the lives of so many innocent victims of senseless violence.

I'm not trying to spark debate...there are no right and wrong answers, but just this one mother's viewpoint.  I will always have the need to protect one of my children, but I have a deeper sense of protecting my community out of love FOR my child...not in spite of it.

This is Home Girl and I just needed to keep it real.  My heartfelt prayers go out to all those affected by these tragic events.


I Am Woody said...

It is so sad that our society puts such a stigma on those that seek help for mental or emotional issues. How much pain could be avoided if seeking aid were encouraged?!?

Gretchen said...

You are a brave and wonderful person. Big hugs to you and may you have a peaceful holiday season.

tara said...

Great post. I really hope this tragedy sparks some change somehow. Not sure what that would look like. My loved ex was "watched" and rightly so. Serious mental illness needs to be taken seriously.

Unknown said...

It breaks my heart that this has happened. I just can't understand. I pray that we can all talk about mental health issues more. I pray we can gather around those that are struggling and support and communicate with them. I pray this will never happen again. Please Jesus.